Me to You

This is for you

A Quest to End All Quests

After much preparation, we donned our attire and set out on our quest. We ventured into a land of snow capped peaks. Occasionally we would find evidence of a world long past.  A time before the snow covered these lands. Discarded cups (from the abode of Lady Wendy), papers, dead animals. It reminded us of time which remained just a vague memory and reminded us of our present quest, the quest that may change the way we communicate forever. The young one desired to kick the bases of these grand glaciers, but I whispered to him not to wake a sleeping giant for we know not the consequences of such actions. Besides, it would have slowed us down. Finally I espied our chariot on the other side of the treacherous five foot peaks. We had neither the provisions nor the equipment needed to ascend the icy pinnacle. We needed to find a pass in which we could enter and hopefully pass through this range. We looked in both directions and saw nothing. With only the stars to guide us we chose north and came upon a pass, with which we were thankful. We carefully maneuvered the pass and when out, we were able to fully take in the backside of the great range. The sight was spectacular. Carefully we made our way to our chariot. Upon entering said vehicle we became aware that while it was normally powered by 130 horses, the number had greatly diminished. Due in part, undoubtedly, to the plunge in temperature. But our quest urged us on.

While traveling in our chariot, the weight of our quest was heavy on our minds. Would this be our final quest? Would our questions be answered? We did not know. We could not know. When we arrived at our destination, the auricle listened to our request. He listened to our predicament and offered a solution. He waved his arms and said some words (admittedly we did not know his language, but assumed he put a charm of sorts on our tool.) He wished us luck and a safe voyage home. Whether we had been able to change our ways of communication or not is left to be seen.

Sometimes I Hate Being a Mom

Mel sent me this link to a blog post about Moms who hate being moms. It is such a breath of fresh air. I have been seriously limiting my online time because I hate the horrible people who are in it.

God forbid some one says they hate being a mom. I am fairly surprised that that woman hasn't been crucified. To tell the truth I have been thinking about it a lot. It's too fucking hard. I can't do it anymore. And it is unfair. It is unfair that I kill myself to be a good, attentive parent every single day and no one can help me. It is unfair that my fucking piece of shit ex doesn't even pay any child support. Nope he just walked away. Sure he pretended for like a month that he wanted to see Ryder, but that clearly did not interest him enough. Or perhaps having his money is more important. Fuck him. Fuck him for choosing drugs over us. Fuck him for not wanting to be a parent.

I digress.

People all over the fucking internet have very mean things to say to each other.

I did not circumcise my son because I just love mutulating male genitallia. And I did the post care that I was told to do. I did not purposely try to screw up my sons life by being neglectful.

I am not a terrible mom for saying being a mom is too difficult. I can't do it any more.

I do not neglect my son because I work full time. Trust me, bitches, if I could spend the time and not have to go to a shit job each day, I fucking would. Fuck you for judging others.

I do not choose to be depressed. I am not purposely choosing the wrong doctors in order to attract attention. I am not being selfish. Perhaps these assholes do not know the difference between sad and depressed. Cause there is a difference. A huge fucking difference.

End rant.

He Melts My Heart

The last time my heart melted was:

An hour ago when Ryder held up the tag in the inside of his shirt and told me there was a note.

This morning when he looked out the window before I put my glasses on and told me it was snowing.

Three days ago when he asked me what time it was, as if he had some sense of the hours.

A week ago when he said "Oh. My. God." for the first time.

Ten days ago when he asked "What's going on here?"

Two weeks ago when we were watching The Muppet Movie and he grabbed his new ukulele and sang and strummed along with Kermit.

I am sure it won't be long until my heart melts again.

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Fucking People, Man

When I see someone going the wrong way down a one way street, I stop them and say "Hey, buddy, this is a one way street." Then they say oops, are embarrassed, then turn around. (Or in the case of taxi drivers, they continue the way they were going.)

This is not the case tonight.

I indicated that I was going to take a right onto a one way street. I had not even begun to turn the car, so I could not see the Do Not Enter. A car going the correct direction blows the stop sign and stops directly in front of my car.

Behind the car was a garage and some huge dude starts yelling "One way! It's a one way!" Over and over again. The woman in the car is saying the same thing. I notice my mistake and turn off my blinker.

These people continue to yell at me. I say okay, okay, but that was not enough for them. The yelling continued. I kinda thought that if that car was not between us, this vigilante mechanic would kick my ass. I could not move, mind you, because the car was directly in front of me. The woman yells "What are you doing?" I look her straight in the eyes and say "Okay, one way, I am sorry." She either saw the desperation in my eyes or she had to rush home to prepare her broom for her evening ride, but either way she moved and I was able to make a U-y and go the other way.

I know I almost went the wrong way, and I am grateful that they told me. But I felt like I was on trial. I needed to stand up, swear on the bible and beg the court's forgiveness, after I properly explained myself, of course.

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Resentment

I resent people who say that they couldn't possibly do chores after work because they're too tired.

I resent people who complain about waking up early, at, say, 10 am.

I resent people who own their own cars.

I resent families that have two parents.

I resent families that have two parents who complain about getting the children ready in the morning.

I resent people who only had 200 dollars to spend on their child for christmas.

I resent people who cannot understand my plight.

I am a very angry person.

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